The beginning – trying to conceive

‘I can’t play sports anymore; I must eat healthier; I should reduce my coffee and alcohol intake; I need to stress less; I can’t go in hot tubs or take hot baths; I shouldn’t buy any new clothes’……  Sound familiar?  These are just some of the thoughts that went through my head in the 3 years my husband and I spent trying to get pregnant.  On top of that I can’t even count the number of times I heard ‘once you stop trying, you’ll get pregnant’ or ‘you just need to relax and it will happen’ or ‘unexplained infertility means there’s nothing wrong with you so you’ll get pregnant.’  I know everyone means well but ARGGGHHHHHHH, some people are just not meant to be babymakers.

So let me back up – I’m Shannon and since I was little I have always wanted 4 kids.  Piece of cake right?  Wrong!  I remember how paranoid I was of getting pregnant before I was ready and how cautious I was thinking ‘I’m going to be so mad if it turns out I can’t get pregnant’ – ha!  Who knew trying to have one child would be so difficult, draining and costly so the likelihood of having 4 is now looking pretty slim.

Enough of being a Debbie downer though – I’m actually in a great place now which is why I wanted to share my story to help others going through the same thing.  If there’s one thing that has gotten me through this journey, it’s the people in my life and the people I’ve met along the way. Without them this would have been a horrible few years.  My husband’s and my marriage is also stronger than ever having gone through the numerous ups and downs of this rollercoaster ride called ‘making a family’.

Last fall after our 2nd failed IVF, my husband and I attended an adoption info session and I knew in that moment I wanted to adopt – luckily my husband agreed and we’ve never looked back!  Although diagnosed with unexplained fertility we figured we’d rather spend our money and emotions on a process where we know we will get the child meant for us, however long it takes.

I hope you enjoy this blog whether you have adopted or are considering adoption or even just curious.

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One comment

  1. Shannon, thank you for sharing your story! Like you, I always expected to get pregnant the very first time I tried. I believed this so strongly that I was SHOCKED when it didn’t happen. The emotions you experience as you go through the “process” are difficult to explain but there is an element of loneliness that accompanies it. It is as though you are being excluded from something that you always believed you would be a part of. That is why it is so important that we share our stories and network with others who are also going through it! And, you never know, some of us may be lucky enough to find a pretty amazing friend that you would never have met otherwise 🙂

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